Consensual Agreement 24/7 D/s

CONSENSUAL AGREEMENT FOR 24:7  D/s

Recommended for only experienced Dominants and submissives.

1. PEOPLE:

Who (only) will take part?________________________________________________

Will any permanent record, contracts, legally binding documents (photographs, audiotapes, videotapes, etc.) be made of the relationship? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation__________________________________________________________

2. ROLES:

Who will be dominant?_________________________________________________

Who will be submissive?_________________________________________________

3. Type of Power Exchange:

[] Master/slave

[] Mistress/slave

[] Captive

[] Age play

[] Servant, butler, etc.

[] Cross-dressing/gender play

[] Animal play

[] Other_________________________

4. Specifics of Power Exchange

Any chance of switching roles? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the submissive promptly obey? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the dominant “overpower” or “force” the submissive? Yes_____ No____ Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive verbally resist? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive physically resist? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does resistance equal a “strong yellow”? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive try to “turn the tables:? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does the submissive agree to wear a collar? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

The submissive agrees to address the dominant by the following title(s): ____________________________________________________________________

5. PLACE:

Location:_____________________________________________________________

Who will ensure privacy?_________________________________________________

6.TIME:

Begin at:__________ Length:________________________

Beginning signal:_______________________________________________________

Ending signal:_________________________________________________________

Who will keep track of time?______________________________________________

7. Statement of Release of Personal Liability

Does everybody involved understand that there is some risk of accident, miscommunication, misperception, and/or unintentional injury?

Yes___ No___

Does everybody involved agree to discuss any mishaps in a constructive and non-blaming manner?

Yes_____ No_____

8. Limits  & SAFETY:

Submissive’s limits:

Any problems with the submissive’s:

  • Heart: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Lungs: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Neck/back/bones/joints: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Liver: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nervous system/mental: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does the submissive wear contact lenses? Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive suffer from carpal tunnel syndrome or any related problems?

Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive have a history of:

  • Seizures: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Dizzy spells: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Diabetes: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Asthma: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Hyperventilation attacks: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Describe any phobias:__________________________________________________

Submissive’s other medical conditions:_____________________________________

Any surgical implants (breast, face, etc.)? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:__________________________________________________________

Does the submissive take aspirin? Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive take ibuprofen, Aleve, or other non-steroidal, anti-inflammatory drugs? Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive take antihistamines? Yes_____ No_____

Other medications the submissive is taking:_________________________________

Is the submissive allergic to:

  • Bandage tape: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nonoxynol-9: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Other allergies:_________________________________________________________

In case of emergency notify:______________________________________________

Dominant’s Limits:

Any problems with the Dominant’s:

  • Heart: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Lungs: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Neck/back/bones/joints: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Kidneys: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Liver: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nervous system/mental: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Dominant’s other medical conditions:______________________________________

Medications the dominant is taking:_______________________________________

In case of emergency notify:______________________________________________

Is the dominant currently certified in First Aid and CPR:

Yes______No_____

Have both parties been tested for Sexually Transmitted Disease?

Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Have both parties been tested for Herpes? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Have participants been tested for HIV? Yes_____ No_____

Has any participant tested positive? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

9. INTOXICANTS (Alcohol, Drugs, Tobacco)

The Dominant can use (only) the following intoxicants during the session: ___________________________________________________________________

Acceptable quantity:____________________________________________________

The submissive can use (only) the following intoxicants during the session: ____________________________________________________________________

Acceptable quantity:____________________________________________________

10. OPPORTUNITIES/SPECIAL SKILLS

Anything either party would especially like to try or explore?

Yes____ No___

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

11. FOLLOW-UP

(Please include a note about who will initiate contacts.)

Daily:_______________________________________________________

Weekly:__________________________________________________________

Monthly:__________________________________________________________

In the event of a crisis:__________________________________________________

12. ANYTHING ELSE?

No____ Yes____

Explanation:__________________________________________

What will become of this form after the termination of the relationship?_________________________

NOTES AND FEEDBACK

How will the Dominant keep record and track the progress of the relationship?

_____                                                                                                                                                    _

Will the submissive have access to these records? _____________________________________________________________________

Does the Dominant agree to maintain a safe environment for communication and growth between both parties; including but not limited to meeting to discuss concerns, accepting inquiries from the submissive regarding expectations/duties, and provide physical, mental , and emotional care and mutual respect? ____________________________________________________________________

Outline the agreed methods of tracking progress:

Outline the agreed methods of addressing concerns and making inquiries (submissive to Dominant):

Outline the agreed forms of aftercare:

Outline the agreed protocols for upholding physical, mental, and emotional health:

Appendix A

SEX & EROTIC HUMILATION

Circle which of the following sexual acts are acceptable:

1. Masturbation:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant
  • self-masturbation by submissive
  • self-masturbation by Dominant

2. Fellatio:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

3. Cunnilingus:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

4. Analingus:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

5. Vaginal fisting:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

6. Anal fisting:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

7. Vaginal intercourse:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

8. Anal intercourse:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

Is swallowing semen acceptable? Yes_____ No_____

Is any participant menstruating? Yes_____ No_____

Will sex toys such as vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, etc. be used? Yes/No

If yes, describe:_______________________________________________________

Which of the above activities will involve birth control pills, diaphragms, spermicidal suppositories, lubricants containing nonoxynol-9, or contraceptive foams/suppositories/gels?__________________________________

Which of the above activities will involve condoms, gloves, dental dams, and/or other barriers?____________________________________________________

EROTIC HUMILIATION

1. The submissive agrees to accept being referred to by the following terms:

2. The submissive agrees to the following forms of erotic humiliation:

  • “verbal abuse”: yes/no
  • enemas: yes/no
  • face slapping: yes/no
  • forced exhibitionism: yes/no
  • spitting: yes/no
  • water sports: yes/no
  • scat games: yes/no
  • Other:______________________________________________________________

Any prior really good or really bad experiences in these areas?________________________________________________________________________________

Appendix B

BONDAGE & DISCIPLINE

1. The submissive agrees to allow (only) the following types of bondage:

  • hands in front: yes/no
  • hands behind back: yes/no
  • ankles: yes/no
  • knees: yes/no
  • elbows: yes/no
  • wrists to ankles (hog-tie): yes/no
  • spreader bars: yes/no
  • tied to chair: yes/no
  • tied to bed: yes/no
  • use of blindfold: yes/no
  • use of gag: yes/no
  • use of hood: yes/no
  • use of rope: yes/no
  • use of tape: yes/no
  • use of leather cuffs: yes/no
  • use of handcuffs/metal restraints: yes/no
  • suspension: yes/no
  • mummification with plastic wrap, body bag, or similar technique: yes/no

Any past bad experiences by either person with bondage, gags, blindfolds, and/or hoods?

Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

2. PAIN

Submissive’s general attitude toward receiving pain:

_____likes _____accepts _____neutral _____dislikes _____will not accept

Quantity of pain the submissive wants to receive:

_____none _____small _____average _____large

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Dominant’s general attitude toward giving pain:

____likes ____will give ____neutral ____dislikes ____will not give

Quantity of pain the Dominant wants to give:

_____none _____small _____average _____large

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “now” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “nod” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “one to ten” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

The following types of pain are acceptable:

  • spanking: yes/no
  • paddling: yes/no
  • flogging: yes/no
  • caning: yes/no
  • face slaps: yes/no
  • biting: yes/no
  • nipple clamps: yes/no
  • genital clamps: yes/no
  • clamps elsewhere: yes/no
  • locations:_________________
  • hot creams: yes/no
  • ice: yes/no
  • hot wax: yes/no
  • tickling: yes/no
  • Other types/methods of pain:_____________________________________________

Additional remarks:_____________________________________________________

3. MARKS

Is it acceptable to the submissive if the play leaves marks?

Yes___ No___

  • Visible while wearing street clothes? Yes____ No____
  • Visible while wearing a bathing suit? Yes____ No____

Is it acceptable to the submissive if the play draws small amounts of blood?

Yes____ No____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

How easy or difficult has it been to mark the submissive in the past? _____________________________________________________________________

APPENDIX C

SAFEWORDS

Safeword # 1 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Safeword # 2 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Safeword # 3 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Non-verbal safewords(signs) and their meaning:____________________________________

TRAFFIC LIGHT SYSTEM:

  • GREEN – Go ahead (used to check in and make sure someone’s ok)
  • AMBER – Proceed with caution, getting close to a limit.
  • RED – Stop what you are doing, it’s over the limit.
  • RED RED RED – Emergency stop, end the whole scene right now. Used if someone’s in serious discomfort, getting scared, getting cramp (which is not fun!) etc.

If you are using gags, you can use finger signals:

  •  one finger = “Green”
  • two fingers = “Amber”
  • three fingers = “Red”
  • five fingers = “Emergency Stop”

APPENDIX D

RIGHTS & RESPONSIBILITIES OF SERVICE

I, (submissives name), of my own free will, offer myself to you, (Dominants name), as your full-time submissive.

  1. I will obey you at all times and will wholeheartedly seek your pleasure and well-being above all other considerations.
  2. I will attend to your needs before my own and will serve you in whatever function you may desire of me.
  3. I will strive diligently to re-mold my body, habits and attitude in accordance with your desires, and will gracefully accept criticism and  instruction.
  4. I agree to wear as outward sign of ownership any items of decoration, permanent or semi-permanent marking at all times. I agree to wear a collar at all times where you deem appropriate. (Items should be listed specifically)
  5. Within the limits of physical safety and my ability to earn a livelihood, I otherwise accept as your prerogative, anything you may choose to do with me, whether as punishment, or for your amusement.
  6. I will maintain our home in a clean and tidy state, in addition to specific chores dictated by you at any time. If I need assistance with the daily chores due to work constraints I will ask for your assistance. If I do not ask for assistance and do not complete the chores, I will be subject to punishment.
  7. I understand and agree that any failure by me to comply fully with your desires shall be regarded as sufficient cause for punishment and/or dismissal.
  8. All interactions with other people, (play, personal time, dates) will be considered on a case by case basis. As the submissive I may not negotiate play with other people on my own. All arrangements must be made through my Dominant. Sexual contact or communication with outside people (anyone other than Dominant regardless of the relationship or previous friendship) is not permitted at all whether in jest or in earnest, and will be severely punished, including termination of the relationship.

I, (submissives name), acknowledge the importance of BDSM in our life and will work to keep the power exchange alive in our daily lives.

Signature:

Date:

1. I, (submissives name), recognize the following freedoms accorded to me by my Dominant:

(List the specific freedoms you accord to the submissive)

a.

b.

c.

d.

e.

2. I place myself fully and with utmost trust into the hands of my (Dominants name or title) knowing full well that he/she respects me and cares for me and that no permanent injury shall deliberately be done to me.

3. I agree to hold my (Dominants name or title) harmless from any civil or criminal liability which may inure to me as a consequence of the actions agreed to in this contract; with the proviso that I do not relinquish the right to legal actions regarding any items specifically excluded from my part of this agreement.

4. My safe word is                                  . I (shall/shall not) have the right to use it at any time during the term of this contract. If I have the right to use it and do so, the contract will [put the conditions to which the contract will be affected by use of the safe word.]


And I, as your (Dominants name or title), accept these terms of your submission to me. I will treat you with respect and will cherish you as My prized possession. I will strive to maintain discipline, consistency, and creativity in our lives.

I require compliance with the following rules: (List your specific rules)

1.

2.

3.

4.

5.

6.

7.

8.

9.    

This contract, signed the (Date: Day, Month, Year) will remain in effect (length of contract), so long as Dominant and submissive remain in consensual  relationship. Addenda and deletions can and will be made as necessary.

In witness whereof, we affix our signatures and seals the day and date this contract was written or revised:

Dominants Signature:                                                                               Submissives Signature:

Title:                                                                                                            Title:

Date:                                                                                                            Date:

Signature of Witness or of Notary:

(If so desired, gives more weight to the contract as a legally binding document)

                                                                                                                                                                                                      

Copyright © 1998 Jay Wiseman with Revisions and additions © 2012 Kris Bethune

A big thanks to Jay Wiseman for his innumerable contributions to BDSM Practice and Safety !

Please visit Jay’s page Submissive Women Kvetch

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