Tags

, , , , , , , , , , , ,

CONSENSUAL NEGOTIATION FOR SCENE PLAY (LONG FORM)

Recommended for novices, please use the back of the form if you need additional space.

1. PEOPLE:

Who (only) will take part?________________________________________________

Who (only) will watch?___________________________________________________

Will any permanent record (photographs, audiotapes, videotapes, etc.) be made of the session? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation__________________________________________________________

2. ROLES:

Who will be dominant?_________________________________________________

Who will be submissive?_________________________________________________

Type of scene:

[] Master/slave

[] Mistress/slave

[] Captive

[] Age play

[] Servant, butler, etc.

[] Cross-dressing/gender play

[] Animal play

[] Other_________________________

Any chance of switching roles? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the submissive promptly obey? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the dominant “overpower” or “force” the submissive? Yes_____ No____ Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive verbally resist? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive physically resist? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does resistance equal a “strong yellow”? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

May the submissive try to “turn the tables:? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does the submissive agree to wear a collar? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

The submissive agrees to address the dominant by the following title(s): ____________________________________________________________________

3. PLACE:

Location:_____________________________________________________________

Who will ensure privacy?_________________________________________________

4. TIME:

Begin at:__________ Length:________________________

Beginning signal:_______________________________________________________

Ending signal:_________________________________________________________

Who will keep track of time?______________________________________________

5. OOPS:

Does everybody involved understand that there is some risk of accident, miscommunication, misperception, and/or unintentional injury?

Yes___ No___

Does everybody involved agree to discuss any mishaps in a constructive and non-blaming manner?

Yes_____ No_____

6. LIMITS & SAFETY:

Submissive’s limits:

Any problems with the submissive’s:

  • Heart: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Lungs: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Neck/back/bones/joints: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Liver: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nervous system/mental: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Is the submissive wearing contact lenses? Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive suffer from carpal tunnel syndrome or any related problems?

Yes_____ No_____

Does the submissive have a history of:

  • Seizures: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Dizzy spells: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Diabetes: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Asthma: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Hyperventilation attacks: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Describe any phobias:__________________________________________________

Submissive’s other medical conditions:_____________________________________

Any surgical implants (breast, face, etc.)? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:__________________________________________________________

Is the submissive taking aspirin? Yes_____ No_____

Is the submissive taking ibuprofen, Aleve, or other non-steroidal, anti-inflammatory drugs? Yes_____ No_____

Is the submissive taking antihistamines? Yes_____ No_____

Other medications the submissive is taking:_________________________________

Is the submissive allergic to:

  • Bandage tape: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nonoxynol-9: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Other allergies:_________________________________________________________

In case of emergency notify:______________________________________________

Dominant’s Limits:

Any problems with the Dominant’s:

  • Heart: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Lungs: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Neck/back/bones/joints: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Kidneys: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Liver: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

  • Nervous system/mental: Yes______No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Dominant’s other medical conditions:______________________________________

Medications the dominant is taking:_______________________________________

In case of emergency notify:______________________________________________

Is the dominant currently certified in First Aid and CPR:

Yes______No_____

Safety gear on hand:

  • Paramedic scissors: yes/no
  • Flashlight: yes/no
  • First aid kit: yes/no
  • Blackout light: yes/no
  • Fire extinguisher: yes/no

Will the play be in an isolated area such as a farmhouse?

Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

If yes, what will ensure the submissive’s safety if the dominant becomes unconscious?

  • No bondage to chair/bed/etc.: yes/no
  • No gag: yes/no
  • Silent alarm: yes/no
  • Third person present: yes/no
  • Telephone/radio/panic button within submissive’s reach: yes/no
  • Other:________________________________________________________________

7. SEX

Does any participant believe they might have a sexually transmitted disease?

Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Does any participant believe they might have herpes? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Have participants been tested for HIV? Yes_____ No_____

Has any participant tested positive? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Circle which of the following sexual acts are acceptable:

  1. Masturbation:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant
  • self-masturbation by submissive
  • self-masturbation by Dominant

2.  Fellatio:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

3.  Cunnilingus:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

4.  Analingus:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

5.  Vaginal fisting:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

6.  Anal fisting:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

7.  Vaginal intercourse:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

8.  Anal intercourse:

  • Dominant to submissive
  • submissive to Dominant

Is swallowing semen acceptable? Yes_____ No_____

Is any participant menstruating? Yes_____ No_____

Will sex toys such as vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, etc. be used? Yes/No

If yes, describe:_______________________________________________________

Which of the above activities will involve birth control pills, diaphragms, spermicidal suppositories, lubricants containing nonoxynol-9, or contraceptive foams/suppositories/gels?__________________________________

Which of the above activities will involve condoms, gloves, dental dams, and/or other barriers?____________________________________________________

8. INTOXICANTS (Not suggested for Scene Play)

The Dominant can use (only) the following intoxicants during the session: ___________________________________________________________________

Acceptable quantity:____________________________________________________

The submissive can use (only) the following intoxicants during the session: ____________________________________________________________________

Acceptable quantity:____________________________________________________

9. BONDAGE

The submissive agrees to allow (only) the following types of bondage:

  • hands in front: yes/no
  • hands behind back: yes/no
  • ankles: yes/no
  • knees: yes/no
  • elbows: yes/no
  • wrists to ankles (hog-tie): yes/no
  • spreader bars: yes/no
  • tied to chair: yes/no
  • tied to bed: yes/no
  • use of blindfold: yes/no
  • use of gag: yes/no
  • use of hood: yes/no
  • use of rope: yes/no
  • use of tape: yes/no
  • use of leather cuffs: yes/no
  • use of handcuffs/metal restraints: yes/no
  • suspension: yes/no
  • mummification with plastic wrap, body bag, or similar technique: yes/no

Any past bad experiences by either person with bondage, gags, blindfolds, and/or hoods? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

10. PAIN

Submissive’s general attitude toward receiving pain:

_____likes _____accepts _____neutral _____dislikes _____will not accept

Quantity of pain the submissive wants to receive:

_____none _____small _____average _____large

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Dominant’s general attitude toward giving pain:

____likes ____will give ____neutral ____dislikes ____will not give

Quantity of pain the Dominant wants to give:

_____none _____small _____average _____large

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “now” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “nod” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

Will the “one to ten” technique be used? Yes_____ No_____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

The following types of pain are acceptable:

  • spanking: yes/no
  • paddling: yes/no
  • flogging: yes/no
  • caning: yes/no
  • face slaps: yes/no
  • biting: yes/no
  • nipple clamps: yes/no
  • genital clamps: yes/no
  • clamps elsewhere: yes/no
  • locations:_________________
  • hot creams: yes/no
  • ice: yes/no
  • hot wax: yes/no
  • tickling: yes/no
  • Other types/methods of pain:_____________________________________________

Additional remarks:_____________________________________________________

11. MARKS

Is it acceptable to the submissive if the play leaves marks?

Yes___ No___

  • Visible while wearing street clothes? Yes____ No____
  • Visible while wearing a bathing suit? Yes____ No____

Is it acceptable to the submissive if the play draws small amounts of blood?

Yes____ No____

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

How easy or difficult has it been to mark the submissive in the past? _____________________________________________________________________

12. EROTIC HUMILIATION

The submissive agrees to accept being referred to by the following terms: _____________________________________________________________________

The submissive agrees to the following forms of erotic humiliation:

  • “verbal abuse”: yes/no
  • enemas: yes/no
  • face slapping: yes/no
  • forced exhibitionism: yes/no
  • spitting: yes/no
  • water sports: yes/no
  • scat games: yes/no
  • Other:______________________________________________________________

Any prior really good or really bad experiences in these areas?________________________________________________________________________________

13. SAFEWORDS

Safeword # 1 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Safeword # 2 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Safeword # 3 and its meaning:____________________________________________

Non-verbal safewords(signs) and their meaning:____________________________________

Will the “two squeezes” technique be used? Yes____ No____

Will the “extended hand” technique be used? Yes____ No____

14. OPPORTUNITIES/SPECIAL SKILLS

Anything either party would especially like to try or explore?

Yes____ No___

Explanation:___________________________________________________________

15. FOLLOW-UP

(Please include a note about who will initiate contacts.)

After the session:_______________________________________________________

The next day:__________________________________________________________

A week later:__________________________________________________________

In the event of a crisis:__________________________________________________

16. ANYTHING ELSE?

No____ Yes____

Explanation:__________________________________________

What will become of this form after the session?_________________________

POST-SESSION NOTES AND FEEDBACK

Dominant Overall feeling about the session on a scale of one-to-ten (ten tops)______

Best part of the session and on a scale of one-to-ten how good was it? _____________________________________________________________________

Worst part of the session and on a scale of one-to-ten how bad was it? ____________________________________________________________________

Other comments:_______________________________________________________

Submissive Overall feeling about the session on a scale of one-to-ten (ten tops)_______

Best part of the session and on a scale of one-to-ten how good was it? ____________________________________________________________________

Worst part of the session and on a scale of one-to-ten how bad was it? ____________________________________________________________________

Other comments:_______________________________________________________

Copyright © 1998 Jay Wiseman

A big thanks to Jay Wiseman for his inumerable contributions to BDSM Practice and Safety  !

Please visit Jay’s page Submissive Women Kvetch

Advertisements